The Socially Awkward Social Media Maven

It never ceases to amaze me how awkward I am at making small talk. You’d think I’d be versed in this skill for all the networking events I go to, not to mention I attend CHURCH, where “stand up and greet your neighbor” is my cue to get another cup of coffee.

So Bryan and I are at this event last night, and now that I’m a big shot Cheezburger blogger and Creative Director who’s out to pimp myself for business, he’s all You should go talk to So-And-So, and You should have Dude-I-Know introduce you to Dude-I-Don’t-Know.

But really I just want to sit in the corner reading twitter, acting like I’m just Bryan’s ride home or something.

Eventually I part with my second husband (read: iPhone) and head out to find Dude-I-Know, who’s always up for a good conversation. In passing, I ask if Dude-I-Don’t-Know is here, and Dude-I-Know points him out to me.

Then I proceed to:

  • Use the bathroom
  • Get another glass of wine
  • Circle the perimeter of the venue
  • Cross the diameter of the venue, thinking I see someone I know
  • Circle the perimeter of the venue again when I realize I was mistaken
  • Hover awkwardly near Dude-I-Don’t-Know
  • Wander over to see what Bryan is up to
  • Circle the perimeter of the venue…again.
  • Hover awkwardly near Dude-I-Don’t-Know…again.

FINALLY, now that security cameras are tracking me as a possible stalker, I step toward Dude-I-Don’t-Know with my hand out.

“Hi Jen,” he says, shaking my hand.

I am completely taken off guard that he knows my name, and smile awkwardly.

Then comes the awkward silence where I am supposed to state my intentions.

Did I mention I was awkward?

“I… uh… I write for Babysaur.”

“Yeah, I know.” he says.

“Ah. Okay.”

And I walked away.

SERIOUSLY.

THAT REALLY HAPPENED.

And while Jenny on the Spot thinks glitter spray is going to solve all my social phobias, I’m not altogether sure I haz the jenny-on-the-spot skilz to think on my feet.

Did I mention I got lost in the parking garage on the way home?

p.s. this awesome photo is by Randy Stewart.

2 thoughts on “The Socially Awkward Social Media Maven”

  1. Hi Jen, This is so me! I’ve circled my share of perimeters at networking events, as if there was actually something to be feared by diving right in. Remarkable, isn’t it?

    In most other venues, there’s no hesitation when meeting new people, but place me in an event where meeting new people is the whole point and I’m clueless.

    JOTS seems to have the social butterfly vibe down, and I aspire to have that kind of happy, glittery, open way about myself. (Okay, maybe not the glitter, but you know what I mean.)

    Keep placing yourself in those situations and I’m sure that breaking the ice will begin to become easier for you. That’s what I have been trying to do, although I haven’t yet reached the comfort zone. Ray

  2. Jen,
    I believe we were at the same event. I think I actually noticed your awkwardness, and would have said hi, but was having my own awkward moments. Next time–I’ll be on the look out for you. We can have an awkward moment, together.

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