It never ceases to amaze me how awkward I am at making small talk. You’d think I’d be versed in this skill for all the networking events I go to, not to mention I attend CHURCH, where “stand up and greet your neighbor” is my cue to get another cup of coffee.
So Bryan and I are at this event last night, and now that I’m a big shot Cheezburger blogger and Creative Director who’s out to pimp myself for business, he’s all You should go talk to So-And-So, and You should have Dude-I-Know introduce you to Dude-I-Don’t-Know.
But really I just want to sit in the corner reading twitter, acting like I’m just Bryan’s ride home or something.
Eventually I part with my second husband (read: iPhone) and head out to find Dude-I-Know, who’s always up for a good conversation. In passing, I ask if Dude-I-Don’t-Know is here, and Dude-I-Know points him out to me.
Then I proceed to:
- Use the bathroom
- Get another glass of wine
- Circle the perimeter of the venue
- Cross the diameter of the venue, thinking I see someone I know
- Circle the perimeter of the venue again when I realize I was mistaken
- Hover awkwardly near Dude-I-Don’t-Know
- Wander over to see what Bryan is up to
- Circle the perimeter of the venue…again.
- Hover awkwardly near Dude-I-Don’t-Know…again.
FINALLY, now that security cameras are tracking me as a possible stalker, I step toward Dude-I-Don’t-Know with my hand out.
“Hi Jen,” he says, shaking my hand.
I am completely taken off guard that he knows my name, and smile awkwardly.
Then comes the awkward silence where I am supposed to state my intentions.
Did I mention I was awkward?
“I… uh… I write for Babysaur.”
“Yeah, I know.” he says.
And I walked away.
THAT REALLY HAPPENED.
Did I mention I got lost in the parking garage on the way home?
p.s. this awesome photo is by Randy Stewart.