Does this look like me? Does this look like anybody who goes to the gym in 2008?
I think the LA Fitness Corporation is run by a single guy who was born circa 1971 and is reliving the Glory Days of hot pink, clown makeup, and Frankie Goes to Hollywood.
These photos were included in marketing materials sent to me when my gym reopened under the new ownership of LA Fitness, and they’re posted ALL OVER THE GYM. There’s even three large posters on the outside of the building WITH NEON PINK HIGHLIGHTS for accenting.
Through the speakers in the locker room Frankie tells me to relax, Madonna suggests I get into the groove, and Chaka Khan says she feels for me. When I work out I can’t escape the flashbacks of braces and awkward slow dancing and really really thick glasses.
My friend, Sarah, and I used to know this guy who always wore tight jeans and a worn, brown leather jacket that would make Starsky and Hutch proud. We concluded that a single guy’s body, mind, and soul must freeze in time if not rescued by a woman or a gainful career post high school graduation.
Clearly the marketing team of L.A. Fitness (coincidentally all from the graduating class of ’89) are all still painfully single.
I don’t know how you people in Los Angeles do fitness, but up here in Seattle I don’t see anybody like this at my gym, except for in the giant creepy posters all over the walls.