It’s been a rough week at the Zughaus. The kids were puking, and I wasn’t getting any sleep. I had to make another trip to the ER with Thomas to rehydrate him, almost had to make a second trip, and throughout it all Bryan had to work until nine or ten at night. Under that kind of stress and exhaustion, he and I haven’t been very nice to each other.
I’ve been patient with the kids to a point, but when one is still sick and the other is feeling better enough to antagonize everyone else I start to lose my mind just a little bit. Posting last night’s video is my attempt at capturing a shining moment in a dark week.
But this morning, when I cheerfully announce that it’s time for preschool and we are actually LEAVING THE HOUSE, and a certain child screams at me to go away because she wants to stay in the bath…these are the moments I break down and cry, right there in front of everybody.
When I spend my week snuggling, and comforting, and worrying, covered in puke and washing load after load of puked on sheets and towels – getting screamed at by those same cherubs I cared for just makes me want to go on strike.
In trying to maintain perspective, I think about Jesus – how he was perfect, sinless, and without fault. Yet in his perfection, he took my lying, angry, bitter sin upon himself and died, taking it all to the grave with him. “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). I’ve been thinking about this all morning. I can’t compete with what kind of sacrifice Jesus made for me, but I know he calls me to love others sacrificially.
So this morning I’ve been praying for peace, graciousness, and a heart that desires to serve, even when my service is not always appreciated.