(Updated January 2008)
Yesterday, in two completely unrelated conversations with two different people, it was brought to my attention that the mood and tone of my blog has been much lighter lately. I was already feeling this way, but it was nice to have an outside perspective volunteer the information to confirm it: I’m not as crazy as I used to be.
Noting, of course, that I’m still just a little bit crazy.
If 2005 and 2006 was about standing in a pile of shit without a shovel, 2007 was about digging my way out. I did this through various means, including but not limited to anti-depressants, soul searching, counseling, intentional community with friends who asked the hard questions, completely breaking down and falling apart, and being rebuilt by a God who has been very gracious and patient with me.
Because my blog has historically been the place where I worked out grief, and rage, and depression, and the general mayhem of my mind, I joked in a recent post that in the absence of these things The Pile I’m Standing In may turn into a food blog.
Recently I read that fellow blogger, writer, and mother, Mommy-Come-Lately, doesn’t make New Year’s Resolutions anymore. Rather, she chooses a theme for the year. I thought this was a brilliant idea, and so I will borrow it from her:
I think 2008 will be about maintaining.
Diet, exercise, emotional stability, spiritual maturity, household management, even temperament, marital communication, realistic expectations, and we mustn’t forget: sexual intimacy.
This is a pretty accomplished list of things that have been brought out from the shadows into the light, isn’t it? These are all the areas in which I’ve grown or established new, healthier, habits over the last few years.
One thing I struggle with is maintaining momentum in the mundane, so this will be my focus for the year.
Going into 2008 I feel more hopeful and less foggy. I hope my writing reflects this, and I hope you will stick around to read it.
As always, feel free to contact me at jen (at) zugbot (dot) com.