This is how people without kids live, with lamp cords dangling right there for anyone to reach. I find this fascinating.
Can you IMAGINE life with dangling cords? I certainly can’t.
I mean, when you’re gettin’ busy without the birth control you don’t really consider the possibility that you’d one day experience culture shock when entering a home with dangling lamp cords.
You see the lamp on your dresser and you think to yourself, lamps have cords. Period. No big deal. Why am I thinking about lamp cords while gettin’ busy?
But then you suddenly find yourself, years later, walking into a home with dangling lamp cords and a tingle ripples through your body that you can’t explain. Things look strangely out of place, and there’s a stillness in the air. It feels familiar, but in an alternate reality sort of way, like you’ve had this dream before.
And then it hits you – dangling lamp cords! You had one back in 1997! It was a beautiful clear glass lamp positioned precariously on a stand in the corner, and nowhere on the lamp shade did it say “pmodkyt” in brown marker.
As this memory heightens your senses you pull your cardigan a little tighter across your chest, hiding the grease spot where the french fry landed after your son threw it across the table; you set your bag down inconspicuously behind the chair – the bag that’s big enough to hold two water bottles, a container of fish crackers, and a change of clothes; you quickly run your fingers through your hair and wonder to yourself, Did I brush my hair this week?
And then the wine is poured, and the music is turned on, and someone greets you – the words make sense! You understand the words she is speaking! You realize all is well in the universe and the only thing separating You from Them is a silly lamp cord and an over-active imagination.