I’ve been super busy finishing up the painting in Bryan’s new office, so all my spare time has been devoted to that and the mounds of laundry that piled up after traveling for two weeks. With Bryan gone so much I’m left with little energy for things that re-create me, and spend most of my time lying on the couch or soaking in the bath. I’m not even watching t.v. or reading my blogs!
I’ve been feeling lethargic, weepy, impatient, and unmotivated again lately. I should probably mention that I weaned completely off my Zoloft while we were at the ocean (going into the week I had been taking 25mg every other day), so I’m probably feeling the effects of that. I’ve replaced my medication with Vitamin C and a B Complex, and Omega 3. At first I felt great on the vitamins – full of energy, and pretty stable emotionally. But now I’m back to sitting in the dark and taking long hot baths and losing it with my children.
But the good news is, I’ve scheduled an appointment with a Naturopathic Doctor who will help my body get back into health again.
Bryan is still traveling a lot, but I’ve been keeping busy with play dates to break up the time alone. The other night my friend’s girls spent the night and we watched Meet the Fockers, and other friends have been coming over for dinner every night because they haven’t installed a stove in their new home yet. Frankly, I look forward to those dinners every night, because by the time they arrive I’m exhausted and they are the kind of friends who don’t take any shit from sassy three-year-olds. Paul said to Ruthie the other night, “I’m your mommy’s friend and I don’t like it when you talk to her that way.â€
I may sneak into their house and cut the gas line to their stove to delay its installation another few days!
It’s interesting being on the other side of a bout of depression, feeling like I may be mildly depressed again. I don’t feel panicked or doomed. It just is what it is. I’m trying to do less, take care of myself more, and just be okay that things may not be getting done.