I DO see the new year as a time of fresh starts, do-overs, and resets. But by the time January 1st rolls around I am thanking the good Lord Almighty that the holidays are over and I can finally have my life back. This return to Normal usually allows for some tweaking, you know what I mean?
Yes, you do. You know exactly what I mean. While youâ€™re thinking about Normal and all that entails you think to yourself, I havenâ€™t been to the gym for awhile, Maybe I should try to get back there a couple times a week now that I have my life back. And there it is: something new and refreshing added to your routine sometime around the vicinity of January 1st.
But to call it a â€˜resolution?â€™ Thatâ€™s just so absolute, so firm, so lacking in any sort of back door escape. The only way out of a resolution is to fail.
Back in The Day I associated my Fresh Starts with the fall. It was crisp, and cool, and I had fresh, virgin, spiral notebooks and new shoes, and with the new school year came a new schedule and a new routine and life was innocent and simple once again.
Life is complicated, now. I fuck up so much more, and when I do, so much more is at stake. I donâ€™t have the same beginnings and endings that I did when school started and finals and term papers consumed my life. I had summers to look forward to, and spring breaks, and Christmas â€“ periods of time without responsibility or work. Now, the days and months and years just blur together for me so all I have left is that godforsaken New Yearâ€™s Resolution.
So in honor of January, and in keeping with the More Clarity to Jen vibes that have been coming my way, here are a few of my Fresh Starts:
1. I will brush my teeth at least once a day.
2. I will give Ruthie the opportunity to potty train instead of saying, â€˜not right now, bitch, Iâ€™m too lazy to get off my assâ€™ when she asks to go pee.
3. I will stop eating chocolate (HA! HA! Just kidding! I just threw that one in there to see if you were paying attention).
4. I will resume my club membership and go at least twice a week.
5. I will try to eat something besides cereal (this may be a stretch, but weâ€™ll give it a whirl).
Very profound, donâ€™t you think?