Comments on: my precious

By: Libby

Libby — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 21:13:22 +0000

Thanks for posting this Jen. I’ll be praying for you! I’ve realized that God is also breaking down my own idols of wanting stability. My flesh tires of moving around all of the time (I spent 19 years in the same house and have moved a dozen or so times since then). But I’m learning to allow God to take me where He wants me and I’m less freaked out and angry by His Grace alone! I’m excited for the next season of my life living with you guys! (Whenever that goes down ).

By: Beth

Beth — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 01:50:03 +0000

I’m glad you wrote this post- I’ve been struggling with this ever since having the baby. Sometimes I used to comfort myself throughout the infertility by thinking (and knowing it wasn’t true) that perhaps God gave children to people to cure them of selfishness, and that clearly I was already so unselfish that I didn’t need children to whip it out of me. Come to find out, I am apparently not nearly so saintly as I once esteemed myself I was reading a book that talked about finding rhythms with a newborn and one woman was quoted as saying that she used to get irritated at having to do all the diapering and feeding and stuff, because she just wanted to get back to doing “her stuff” and then she suddenly realized that the baby *was* “her stuff.” That one hit home too. Annnnyway… I’m glad you wrote this post

By: tamara murphy

tamara murphy — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 16:54:50 +0000

Honestly hits a bulls-eye with me.
Thanks for the words.

By: Sheila

Sheila — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 01:09:03 +0000

You’re killing me here. Seriously, I am just like that. Seeking my own comfort and self-interest first. Thanks for challenging me.

By: Jess

Jess — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 23:15:13 +0000

Thank you for your post today. I’ve been faced with the reality of this in the last 8 months. The day after Thanksgiving our then 2 and a half year old daughter was diagnosed with Leukemia. Our lives have become completely taken over by her treatment. We literally live in the hospital half of the time. It’s amazing how much selfishness you can still have even under such circumstances. Self-comfort… oh yeah. ‘I haven’t had a good nights sleep in months… my back hurts… today was miserable… I deserve a treat or this or that… whatever.’ UGH. Oh… the little games we play in our minds to please our idols. Just wanted to say you’re not alone. Even in a circumstance in which you would think you would only care about your child… selfishness comes right on out.

By: Melissa

Melissa — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 17:02:16 +0000

Once again, piercing my heart to it’s wretched core. I’d like to thank you for your transparency but since it pisses me off to face my true bitchiness, I’ll pass this time. Now… off to deal with some of that shit in my soul…

By: Jim Hughes

Jim Hughes — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 16:05:49 +0000

Lot’s of honesty in what you write, Jen. But also a pretty good description of the rest of us and how we are naturally selfish, even when we seem to be people who care and do a lot for others. But there is also another side to this.

We are to love ourselves like we love others. If we don’t take care of our own needs, we don’t have the reserve to care for others. When we get in that position, the result is also exactly what you describe: anger, frustration, loss of energy, even depression. So when we feel these, we need to ask a hard question: are the feelings due to selfishness, or are they due to not loving ourselves enough to take care of our needs.

As in the rest of life, this balance is tenuous.

Blessings.