I swear, this is exactly how the conversation went.

Ruthie: Look, Mom, I HAVE GUM?

Me: Uh, where did you get that?

Ruthie (shrugs shoulders): I don’t know.

Me: No really, where did you get that.

Ruthie: I don’t know!

Me: Ruthie, you need to tell me the truth.

Ruthie: Off the floor.

Me: OFF THE FLOOR? YOU PICKED USED GUM OFF THE FLOOR AND PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH??

Ruthie: No.

(Look of relief on my face).

Ruthie (with dramatic hand motions to illustrate): I picked the hair off it first.

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